Traveling Updates

So these past two weekends got pretty busy. It’s moment like this where shows not even a week passed seem distant. So here’s a quick recap.

Headlined Planet Gemini in Monterey, CA. It was great! I brought James along as my feature. I pulled out a closer only seen at the Irvine Improv and South Texas shows. It involved wigs and glow in the dark earrings. Only bummer was the rain. Hoping to be invited back in the summer. The craziest moment of the weekend was watching one of my jokes come to life right before my eyes.

It was St. Patty’s Day. Lots of green drinking. The night was ending and of course the “couple fight” was due. This dude was just talking shit to his girl. A weird taunt talking shit. She was so upset. “Don’t touch me!” The friends they came with sent the guy away. She started crying only to realize she lost her purse. It was turning into a shitty night.

James and I were commenting, breaking down the upcoming events. She said, “Don’t touch me!” She’s livid and looking for trouble. Then later in the night, she’ll go home, and tell her man, “All I wanted was a hug.” What this really means is, “I did something you wouldn’t like and now I feel justified. You’ll never know what I did because I’ll act like a hurt puppy and you’ll fall for it.” Women love this technique. Being that we are guys, we won’t really know what girls do in those times of “invisibility”.

As we are saying this, the girl finds her purse. She looks into it. Everything’s fine and then she walks over to some girl standing up against the wall and starts making out with her like crazy. She’s running her hands under the girl’s green hair and just going to town. The girl gladly makes out with her. All of this in front of the green hair girl’s boyfriend, who turns to us and says over and over, “What what… am I supposed to do… I just… what am I supposed to do.” The makeout session last for 5 minutes and “Invisible Girl” is satisfied. She grab her jacket and left.

We finally saw just a hint of what girls do when they are pissed at their boyfriend and drunk. I’m sure this is the tamest thing that happens but… women.

Then we spent the next 4 days in East Oakland. I slept in a loveseat that wasn’t half my size. “Got a couple of couches, sleep on the loveseat.” James, Chris Storin and I recorded a rap song that will be out very soon. This guy asked us for change and then asked us to drive him to the detox center. We saw a rap video get made in San Francisco. Did some great shows. I closed “Big Al’s Big Ass Show” at the San Jose Improv, I made up a dance that I called the “No Socks” dance and got a partial standing ovation, to which I replied, “Oh you big sillies.” I started blushing.

Now I’m in Sacramento, finally in a bed and ready to see how this weekend goes. I’ve already been “Eiffel Towered” by two girls for a picture. Pics to be posted soon

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